Doubt
continued....
Human tendency is that we believe that what we believe is actually true. The truth is that believing that the world is flat, does not make the world flat. Many of our beliefs or programs that we have formed over time as a result of our upbringing and conditioning by society do not match reality. Some of these erroneous beliefs are; that kind and caring people worry and that worrying actually changes things. Likewise the belief that people should be kind, polite and honest, for us to be happy is equally false. Another widely held belief that fails the reality test is that other people believe what you believe, or that they see the world the way you do. Here is a particularly relevant one, the child’s behaviour reflects the type of parent you are. Lastly, that other people’s beliefs and behaviours, especially towards us, should directly impact our state of mind. We may also believe that we need a peaceful environment, with well-behaved children to possess inner peace. None of these statements are truth; they are simply what we have created in our minds based on perception. Peaceful living and effective parenting requires us to shift these limiting perceptions.
The shift of perception that often leads to personal freedom usually requires a 180 degree turn about from our old thoughts. If you expect others to be thoughtful and respectful and have an attachment to this belief, then one can expect a lot of disappointment. Flipping this perception completely around so that you do not expect nor are you attached to other people behaving in respectful ways yields freedom. Now when people are respectful you feel grateful and yet they’re behaviour does not drive your happiness or peace. When children or adults are rude, you notice it and choose not to react to it. Your growing awareness becomes a seed towards inner peace. You simply observe the behaviour and notice that your peace and happiness is untouched. That which you have no control over is not your stuff, it is their stuff. Your response now is not confused with fear and you can choose to respond from a loving perspective. Being observant, non-reactionary, peaceful and detached from the drama does not mean that you also cease to guide yourself or your children. Rather, by practicing the above concepts you will guide your children and yourself more from a position of love than from doubt, worry and fear.
Return...
continued....
Human tendency is that we believe that what we believe is actually true. The truth is that believing that the world is flat, does not make the world flat. Many of our beliefs or programs that we have formed over time as a result of our upbringing and conditioning by society do not match reality. Some of these erroneous beliefs are; that kind and caring people worry and that worrying actually changes things. Likewise the belief that people should be kind, polite and honest, for us to be happy is equally false. Another widely held belief that fails the reality test is that other people believe what you believe, or that they see the world the way you do. Here is a particularly relevant one, the child’s behaviour reflects the type of parent you are. Lastly, that other people’s beliefs and behaviours, especially towards us, should directly impact our state of mind. We may also believe that we need a peaceful environment, with well-behaved children to possess inner peace. None of these statements are truth; they are simply what we have created in our minds based on perception. Peaceful living and effective parenting requires us to shift these limiting perceptions.
The shift of perception that often leads to personal freedom usually requires a 180 degree turn about from our old thoughts. If you expect others to be thoughtful and respectful and have an attachment to this belief, then one can expect a lot of disappointment. Flipping this perception completely around so that you do not expect nor are you attached to other people behaving in respectful ways yields freedom. Now when people are respectful you feel grateful and yet they’re behaviour does not drive your happiness or peace. When children or adults are rude, you notice it and choose not to react to it. Your growing awareness becomes a seed towards inner peace. You simply observe the behaviour and notice that your peace and happiness is untouched. That which you have no control over is not your stuff, it is their stuff. Your response now is not confused with fear and you can choose to respond from a loving perspective. Being observant, non-reactionary, peaceful and detached from the drama does not mean that you also cease to guide yourself or your children. Rather, by practicing the above concepts you will guide your children and yourself more from a position of love than from doubt, worry and fear.
Return...
